I used to get one, maybe two comments on what I write, and so I would respond to each person on their own site, but the number has increased so I have taken to responding to them all at once here. I hope no one objects… if you do, e-mail me and I will try not to respond to your comments on this site… (I could forget, y’know, I gotta CMA…)
This is actually much easier, as I am programed to respond to questions…
The A-Bomb and Mom
CultofDizzo: Much respect to your mom. She survived a horrific event and in the end demonstrated her dignity and selflessness. For all the hype about the War on Terror, I still believe your mom and her generation will continue to define what a true-life hero is.
Thanks, Dizzy. I’m pretty sure my mother would not define herself as a hero, but she was a survivor, somthing that she passed on to my siblings and me.
Sleetse: Yeah, you’re right, parents are usually right, plus they have the power to disown you and leave you off the will, now thats scary.
Sleetse, I love your sarcasm. The power to disown can certainly make parents look “right”… haha… You will get no argument from me.
Pochi124: I appreciate my parents. i just despise my brother with a passion….
Now, now, Pochi, It’s nice that you love your parents, but your brother is just being “your brother”. I think there’s a contract signed by all would-be brothers that they must make their sister’s life miserable, but with decreasing degrees of misery as the contract slowly reaches its expiration date. My contract has yet to expire–according to my sister–but its close…
Not Living Up to Expectations
Tiggerj: Did living in a J-world prevent you from being integrated? Was this insulation a good or bad thing?
Yes, Tigger, living in a J world prevented me from being integrated. I agree with you that we should live in an integrated world where everyone is equal. However, for this to really work, everyone must truly consider each other equal. That is not the case in the US; it is not the case in Japan; it is not the case in many places, so people–including me in my own small way–need to voice ourselves, even in the relatively “isolated” world of Xanga
Piratechan: Imagine if you hadn’t gone through all that identity stuff in your teens… wouldn’t it be awful if you were only now beginning to feel the uncomfortableness of it? I think that’s what happens to the Asian wife and mother role in America. The perceived isolation results in a lack of support, and some women look out to see choices, and some stay firmly entrenched. And some of both end up happy.
Yes, it would be terrible if I had to go through it now–at MY age… teens are far more resillient, although, they can also be vulnerable, easily swayed in the wrong direction… so its a pretty precarious tightrope, actually. I was just very fortunate… I always seemed to meet the right person at the right time. I hope some of my kids feel that way about me, but youknow kids… BTW: are you talking about my mother, your mother, or maybe both…
Nefarious: You found another girl!? you’re one of those! haha 😉 j/k. After BA, did you measure all your other relationships with women by comparing them to her?
My new good friend, the Hatter, yes, as a matter of fact, I WAS ONE OF THOSE. i am not proud of it, but I’m not about to hide it at this point. You will read about some of it in my next installment, I think. As for BA, compared women to her for many years, and no one mearsured up to her. One of the reasons I broke up with her is that I didn’t think she was “Japanese” enough… If I knew then what I know now, that NEVER would have been an issue… She is now, of course, a respected professional in her field and would probably kill me if she saw her photo–as innocuous-looking as it is–on this page. Just to CMA, I should state for the record that I no longer compare other with her (you hear that Musubi-chan?)
Mattblue: Hey, I’ve been reading your “Not Living Up to Expectations” entries, and they’re absolutely fascinating. I think it’s great that you write about your past, as opposed to the majority of us, like you said, who write about the present (I’m guilty of using blogs as venting space). I hope you don’t mind me subscribing to this journal.
You’re kidding, right? OF COURSE I DON’T MIND! And tell your friends -just kidding- But seriously, I am humbled by your words and happy that you find them interesting enough to subscribe. Now, it’s okay to vent. Indeed, that is exactly what I’m doing: blowing off steam–the definition of venting? I am, however, relying on past experiences to convey my thoughts which give it a mellower, sepia tone to it… haha. I also use fewer four-letter words, exclamations marks and rAnDoM cApitALiZAtioN RuLEs… I should say, though, that I am truly pleased that I can effect a response from even one person like you… but then, that’s my job, sorta… As a post-secondary instructor, my goal is not for students to memorize stuff like names and dates (well, maybe kanji is the exception), but to think in new and different ways… A number of my kids subscribe to Onigiriman, but there are now more subscribers who are “not my kids”, but I welcome them and treat them as I do my own… or at least I try to… Speaking of which, there’s a HS girl in Okinawa named…
Masumi: [ translation in brackets ] 沖縄も [ Okinawa is also ] isolated, safe, protected, and comfortable. it’s definitely not the real world. ずっとこのままここにいたら、何も変わらないし、何も経験しない [ If I stay here like this, nothing would change, and I would experience nothing ]… “one where i would never grow up.”でも、こういう所もっていいと思うなぁ [ But I think that a place like this is good as well ]。a place where you can always go back to and realize that nothing really changes in some places. 居心地がいい所。 [ a comfortable place ]… さぁーね！思い付いた事言っただけっす・・ほいっ！ [ Well now, I just said what came to my mind… so there! ]
Masumi, ALWAYS say what you think and feel. It’s good for the soul–especially if you’re going to college! (haha, inside joke.) BTW: is the translation/interpretation okay? (Sometimes its hard to tell with Japanese exclamations…) I think that anywhere anyone grows up in a safe, secure environment, he or she feels comfortable. And it is fine to have such a place to return to. Whenever I go back to LA, it is reassuring to see the same people and the same sites as before… But I always have to leave. It looks comforting for a moment, until I realize it’s kind of a stagnant pool. I see many of my old classmates still playing basketball on Sundays with the same members, representing the same team, hanging out with the same crowd, except with kids now. Do they ever wonder if there are opportunites in other places, meeting new people, striving for new goals? I’m a flowing river kind of guy, ala Kamo no Chomei. I can’t help but think, “There, but for the grace of God, go I.” Thanks BA…
Tomorrow Just some weekend fluff–An Alphabetical list of priorities I stole from dAnxdAn…