A PG Story

I

have placed limitations on some jokes because I don’t think the I should make sexual content available to underaged people. I know that young ones know what’s what. I knew what was what when I was 16 so I figure it must be even younger now. But as an *ahem* educator, I feel the need to draw the line. Free speech is great, but only when tempered with common sense and responsibility, although I admittedly have little of both.

But here’s a cute anecdote from my youth when I worked at the sweet shop in J-town in the early to mid 1970s.

**********************************

My boss was really cool. She was older than me by about a dozen years, but she would talk to me as an equal and treated me like a member of the family. Indeed, after working there for about 6 months, many thought we were brother and sister, the way we interacted.

Once, the confectioners were talking dirty in the back room and teasing me about what kind of woman I like and they were threatening to start a pool on when I lost–or will lose–my virginity. I, of course, played along with them. I tried to be coy and said “Oh my virgin ears.”

I didn’t know my boss was standing behind me, but she grabbed me and stuck her finger in my ear.

The confectioners were cracking up, screaming to each other, “We shoulda bet on today!”

But I think they were laughing more at my red face.

But my boss also had her embarrassing moment. Once I went with her and her girlfriend for afternoon coffee–yeah, she would take me with her pretty often, I was so spoiled. Her friend, Dot, had just gotten married to a pharmiscist and she was talking about her experience of helping her new husband at the pharmacy.

“Hey, you guys. You should see the the condoms they sell now.”

Me, I had no idea about condoms and was perked up my ears to hear of the possible options available to young men like me.

“Uh-huh,” Dot continued, ” They come in all sizes. Medium, large. The extra large are huge.”

I wonder what size I would wear? I thought myself.

“And they have these condoms with ribs and bumps on them. And all kinds of colors: red, blue, green, yellow.”

I was speechless.

“Yeah,” my boss spoke up, “I figure that one of these days, they’ll come out with flavors.”

Dot and I froze with our eyes wide and jaws dropped. (OOO;)

“…….”

After an appropriate and respectful amount of silence, we began laughing and could not stop for about 5 minutes.

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