Good Morning, Bruin Nation, II

I feel much better knowing that I don’t have a heart problem–see below. Anyway, it is the day before the BIG game so…

Another post from the Bruin Forum. I spend waaaaaay too much time over there.

R

ise and shine fellow Bruins.
Another day closer to the Fall of Troy, the Whacking of Bush, the Whiter Shade of Pale, the Announcement of Leinart’s engagement to Nick Lachey: One more day!

Yesterday, I wore my Bruin gear. Some of my students looked at me incredulously and just shook their heads. But that’s cool. They see my passion for our Bruins. The school I teach at doesn’t have a football team (horrors!), so some of my students have taken to following UCLA scores. One student even told me he’s adopted the Bruins as his college football team of choice. Ah, the joys of molding young lads and lassies…

Anyway, we all know that virtually no one–NO ONE–gives our Bruins a chance. So I guess this inevitably goes to $C’s head. Still, the arrogance is appalling. “You really can’t game plan for (Bush),” Leinart said. “You can’t really game plan for us.” http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/cfootball/250368_miller01.html

Still, I get the impression that Pom Pom Pete has been talking to the troops and telling them to talk up the rivalry. The Trojies are now calling this a big game:

Frostee Rucker: “The rivalry means a lot.”

Matt Leinart: “It’s just a big rivalry game.”

Reggie Bush: “It’s one of the biggest rivalries in college football. This is one of the biggest games of the season.”

Pom Pom Pete: “The energy’s different. You can feel it. It’s so obvious, you don’t have to make a big deal about it. It’s a big deal – it’s a real big deal.”

Go figure. And I think I finally figured out the point spread. UCLA were 23 point underdogs last year, but they barely lost 29-24. This year we are 9-1, but the point spread improved by only one point. Does that make sense? Especially after Fresno St. easily covered their 23 point spread a couple of weeks ago? Correct me if I’m wrong, but I believe that the odds makers set the odds based on what they feel is a point spread that will even out the betting, right? In other words, in order to get roughly the same number of people to bet on UCLA as on $C, there has to be a 22 point spread. Could this indicate that the odds makers view the $C fans as a bunch of Homers? I mean, they obviously think that a Trojie Homer will give UCLA 21 points and still put down money! I don’t see that as the odds makers making a monkey out of UCLA, I think they are making a monkey outa $C fans. And they’re eating it up. Well, my money’s on our boys.

Trash Talk

If you’re a Trojie–or are queazy about trash talking–you may want to skip the rest of the post

Anyway, on the Bruin Forum where I am spending too much time, there was an SC poster–how he got on, I do not know–but the following is an excerpt of what he posted.

CAN YOU BRUINS SAY REGGIE BUSH? Interstate “5” is coming right down through your Bear ____, all 8 lanes are full speed and the express lanes are wide open on Saturday starting at 1:30 p.m. You better hop on that freeway ramp, roll down your windows, put your shades on, take off that powder blue skirt, get a Westwood plastic beauty and enjoy the wind of BUSH.

If you are unaware, Bush is the phenomenal running back at SC. I will admit it, even though he is one arrogant son of a bitch. but I am not about to be outdone. I could not NOT respond to his idiotic statement.

It is cute and amusing to see a Trojan pretend to be articulate. It is like a little girl putting on her mommy’s make up, trying to be all grown up. Of course, I’m sure you are not a little girl so that would make you either a transvestite or simply pathetic. To think that an SC graduate had actually learned something even remotely academic is a joke–your attempt to revise the UCLA acronym with “University of Colossal Losers Anonymous” mirrors the puerile attempt by “So Hi In Time Bruin”. In case you don’t get it, the acronym spells S.H.I.T. Oh yeah, so you don’t have to reach for your dictionary, “puerile” means “lack of maturity.”

You claim that we are the “pretender to the greatness that is THE University of California – the ‘Southern Campus’ “? No, we didn’t give the world OJ, but we did, as you say, give “you” John Wooden/Sam Gilbert, Angela Davis, Geisha Houses, illegal use of handicapped parking placards and perfection at scalping Rose Bowl tickets. We have also given you an ecclectic list of people including Francis Ford Coppola, Kareem Abdul Jabbar, and four Nobel Laureates. I hestitate to mention Jackie Robinson, since your comment on “ucla education being bi-lingual in Chinese” exposes you as a racist. I mean, I thought SUC graduates were uneducated, but I never pegged them as racists… until now. Thank you for clearing that up.

Finally, your attempt at feminizing the Bruin image is truly weak. The “powder blue skirt” that you insist we take off on the freeway is obviously your attempt at metaphor. I call it weak because it is a metaphor that you must have come up with rather easily. One look at your effeminate mascot instantly reveals that a Trojan is actually a man in a skirt; it is not a metaphor. It shouldn’t be too difficult to reassign your inadequacies onto a rival you hate so much.

Be that as it may, on Saturday, perhaps YOU should lift up your collective skirts and show us your Bush. I mean, you will provide us with Trojans, right?

Anyway, one more day!

Goooooooooooooooooooo Bruins!

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